Monday, July 26, 2010

Standing still

I'm in a funk. No, this doesn't happen often but when it does? Watch out. I have been struggling with Malachi lately. I fell like he is NEVER going to get pass this stage in life. The hitting, the throwing toys, the pulling hair and laughing all the while. What is a momma to do? I am at a loss of how to discipline this child. I don't think cognitively he understands why he can't do these thing. All he knows is he gets a reaction out of me and thats good enough for him. I need help! What worked for your kids? Does anyone have any magic potion's or tricks? I'm desperate and will try nearly anything (horse tranquilizers are out of the question, sorry friends).

Im also struggling with his slow development. Ugh. I want so desperately for him to be walking but hes not. I feel like he has been so close for the last month, yet still nothing more than 5-10 steps (on a good day). He will not transition into standing on his own but will stand alone for 1-2 mins if I set him like that. He has orthotics but im not convinced they do anything. I feel like his PT could be showing me more things to do. I think he could try a little harder but hes so dang stubborn and crawling is much less work. Wanna know what else, I wish he never had the stroke. I wish the stroke didn't leave his right side parallelized, I wish he didn't have Moyamoya. I wish he didn't have to fight so hard to put a block into a container. I wish he could tell me what he wants. I wish I didn't feel this way right now.

Right now I feel like things are standing still. The sun rises and sets yet nothing changes. The next day holds the same things as the last and all we ever do is therapy. I HATE feeling this way but in my attempts to be authentic, here it is. yikes...please pass soon!


Tara said...

Oh, sweetie, we've all been there (or will be). Our kiddos seem to stay "stuck" sometimes, but it's usually followed by a skill explosion. Hang in there! As far as the behavior goes, the only way I've found to deter some of it is to show him a replacement behavior. For example, when he pulls my hair, I say "No!", followed by "gentle" and make his hand do a stroking motion on my hair. Then I clap when he does it nicely. I did the same thing with cup throwing. "No!" followed by "it goes here" and placing it on his tray. Every time he put it on his tray (hand over hand), I made a big fuss and clapped. Soon, he was putting it there on his own. Hth!

Lacey said...

I wish I had some advice on the hitting! But the developments, just try to remember he'll do it on his own time. I know thats hard, but he did just go through a huge surgery and a stroke!

Kristin said...

Max pulls hair, bites, and throws REALLY hard. He doesn't mean to hurt. He just doesn't get it yet. I asked our EI person about it just today. She agreed that he didn't get that he was hurting anyone. She suggested telling him to throw soft, which he doesn't understand yet, either. But he LOVES the sound of toys crashing off the walls - it's just unfortunate that people's faces get in the way. Seriously - I don't know what to do either!

Hewett Happenings said...

Hang in there. As has been said, each child develops at his/her own time. Malachi has done some amazing things, and there is more to come. His stroke/surgery has probably slowed things a bit, but give him time. The hitting/biting thing is actually a pretty normal developmental milestone. See, he's developing. ;)

My daughter was a drug baby, and her development has been VERY slow. It always seems that she will take one step back, then two forward. Just enjoy him, he will be grown up way too soon, so if you can squeeze a little more "baby time" out of him, enjoy it.