Monday, September 14, 2009

Is he walking yet?

I'm warning you now, this is going to be a venting post!! I've lost my cool and I NEED, no, I MUST, vent! And you my friends get to put up with me...venting! Here it goes....

Question:  why is it that when ever someone finds out that a child is 1 or older they always ask "is he/she walking yet?" As if that is some sort of clue as to how far, or not far behind they are. This NEVER used to frustrate me until I had a child, was is in fact over a year old and NOT walking. Now this question makes me blood boil! Perhaps it's not the question itself, but the reaction to the answer. We were somewhere and I over heard someone asking another person (who is VERY close to us) how old Malachi was and if he was walking. The response was "no, but he's crawling." (Which in our eyes is HUGE!!) The person who asked the question just said "oh." I overheard this and had to walk away. Hence the reason for this post. Why do we put so much importance on milestones? Is it really important that a child holds their head up at 3 months and rolls over at 4? (yes is get that we need to evaluate milestones to see if therapy is needed, I get it) Isn't it was more important that the child is happy, well adjusted and has a good personality? Or that they are trying their hardest to accomplish crawling? Does it really matter if they are walking by 1 or is it more important that they have the determination to keep trying? I will be brave enough to say that Malachi is  still drinking form a bottle, he isn't interested in baby food, he has a severe gag reflex's that prohibits him from feeding himself, he can't put things into containers and he cant walk. But Malachi can smile, laugh and hug. I will choose to measure his success by his personality, his determination and his ability to put a smile on anyones face. Malachi is doing something more important  than walking, he is changing the world one smile at a time And that is so much more important.

7 comments:

elizabethmauger said...

All I have to say is I am so proud of Malachi crawling. My daughter did not crawl until she was 13 months and did not walk until she was 19 months and she is running now! Every child id there own person! Be glad he isnt walking because then you have to run after him! I was thankful Megan had some delays! My favorite statement is we teach kids the first few years of their life to walk and talk and the rest of the years telling them to sit down and be quiet! Savor his great achievements and from a mom who knows he will get there (In his own time)!

Emily said...

I LOVE the comment you made about him changing the world one smile at a time. Isn't it so true. I can relate... I think we all can. When they reach their milestones, of course it's a huge moment. Until then, we appreciate all the other wonderful things that they can do! Justin is 16 1/2 months and can't hold his bottle, can't stand on his own, can't walk... but he WILL at his own pace!

Kristin said...

My non-Ds daughter didn't even walk until she was 17 months old, didn't crawl until almost a year. I loved her being non-mobile! Everyone does it on their own time schedule, special needs or not :)
I agree, some people think it's a competition. I bet Malachi gives {and gets} better hugs than all those walkers ;)

Lacey said...

Its totally frustrating. People don't understand that even "normal" kids develop on different levels. Sometimes I handle people ok, and other times I have to walk away to avoid a scene.

datri said...

We get the "Is she talking yet?" question!

Denise said...

Way to go!!! I get that question all the time. The other one I get that I know the answer surprises people is "How old is she" and I know when I say she is 17 months, they are surprised because she isn't walking yet. She didn't crawl until 15 months and has no interst in standing so I have a feeling that walking is a ways off. But like you said....she smils ALWAYS and is so happy just the way she is. She wins people over with her looks every time we go to the store....so be it!! By the way, like I said, Ella is 17 months old and still ONLY drinks her bottle so you are not alone in that one at all. I just try to relish in the fact that she is still so easy and I don't have to chase her all over yet!!!

Anderson Family said...

I hear you too. Carter is still army crawling - not on his hands and knees - doesn't walk - still drinks from a bottle and is 17 months old. I too am relishing in my BABY a little longer - because my other kids grew up too fast and I have loved having the baby stage for a long time. Plus I haven't had to babyproof the house yet - an added bonus! You hit it right on with the smiles changing the world - who cares when they walk when they can make anyone smile???